It's funny how your ideas on things change about parenting- before you have a child, and then they continue to change as things go.
When I heard about BLW, it made sense, I studied the book, and decided to go along with it.
We started with purely fingerfood at 6 months
I'm not exactly sure, but I don't think she'd had anything but finger food at 12 months, where we discovered her love of mashed potato- so she had mash
And then closer to 18 months, we discovered pureed food is very handy when she'll hardly eat any solid food for weeks when teething.
Finger food- mash-puree
Sound really backwards to anyone else?
What I've discovered along the way:
* You can serve up broccoli for a year- but she still won't eat it. I'm starting to think fussy eating is inherent to some degree, rather than something that can be avoided by an eating/ feeding method. We eat our vegetables in front of her. We serve her vegetables. After that, mayby we just have to admit mayby she's just not fond of broccoli for now.
* Puree of itself is not evil. (shock, horror)
* Sometimes, for the parent at least, any (healthy-ish) food she eats is better than no food. Rachael seems to take teething harder than most children. And, to be perfectly honest, I'm finding it hard for breastmilk to be nearly the entire food source for an 18 month old who happens to be both teething and having a growth spurt at the same time, for weeks on end, all day and all night. A little help by puree is appreciated to give me a little break.
*Kids really love those sqeegy pouches. Crazy stuff; if it's in a pouch, it'll get sucked dry quickly. Even though the manufacturers state you've got to decant the food first, honesty, no-one does because this way it gets eaten. I see parents everyday giving them tothe kids like this. I'm pretty sure it's the reason why they're packaged like that in the first place, but they're just covering their backsides.
*BLW purists would be appalled.
But you know what? I don't have a problem with the way we're doing things. Firstly, we've figured out by now Rachael is not your "average" child. She's not at all inclined to follow the baby books, or the "methods". I don't wish we'd gone back and done purees from the begining; I like that Rachael is not used to being force fed. She's confident and in control. Even when that independance can be inconvenient to us at times.
So we've been to BLW, and back again. We've learnt some stuff, softened ideals on some stuff. And that's just the way it goes.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Monday, March 5, 2012
18 months
18 months- another one of the "big ones". However, I more feel at the moment like she's a little baby again, rather than a big girl. Blame the teething. Teething always sends her on quite a regression. We go back to being whiny, impatient, clingy and teary. Also, Rachael eats practically no solids, preferring round the clock breastfeeding, and not much sleep overnight, even in our bed. She even woke up crying strongly, it took us a while to be able to calm her down again. A difference between the "big girl who acts like a little baby while teething" and an actual little baby is the big girl version also throws tantrums. Yesterday it was screaming and thrashing about in. the. library. (honestly, of all places) because mummy said it was time to go. It's the four eye teeth that are cutting through the gums. At least we know from experience that so far, this behavior change has only lasted for about two weeks each time, so we'll get through it, and out the other side. But really, two weeks sounds like a long time from where I'm standing. We haven't been able to get any Panadol into her yet, as she just spits it all out. I've also tried mixing it into some pureed apple and berry mix, but haven't managed to get it into her yet.
Before the regression, I;m pleased to say we were doing quite well. Rachael was eating meals and snacks throughout the day, as well as plenty of water. Sleeping was on the improve too. Our night routine works quite well. Rachael is happy to go into her cot once the routine is finished, knowing she's going to go to sleep. I just sit next to the cot, so she knows I'm there if needed. On a "good" night, she'll go to sleep herself fairly quickly and happily. Some nights she finds it rather diffucult to go to sleep though. It's quite funny to watch, because she'll have backside in the air, and moving around, but with her head on the mattress the whole time, like she's trying to say that she really is trying to get to sleep. On these nights, she'll often need my hand in the cot with her; to either just hold onto, or sometimes I pat her to try to help her settle in, or just have my hand on her. She seems to appreciate having me there as a "only if needed measure". Once she's settled in, but usually not asleep, she's ok for me to leave the room. So she really is learning to go to sleep by herself, but in a comfortable and supported way.We'll be back to it after this phase passes, I'm sure.
Today we had Rachael's 18 month checkup, and vaccination. Boy oh boy, needle soreness on top of teething, we're going to have an interesting few days coming up it seems. I have no idea why, but I've just found out the health nurse didn't put her info into her blue book. I do remember though that's she's 10.6kg. About 40th percentile weight, and 20th percentile height, with a small head. All of the above is pretty normal for her.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Sleeping
I'm just so proud of Rachael right now.
Sleep-wise, three nights ago, I decided that she was responding quite well to the night routine that I'd move it onto the next phase of getting her to go to sleep in her own cot after her feed.
First night, she was drowsy after the feed, and after 15 minutes was asleep in the cot after being patted to sleep.
Night two, she was super tired, and was asleep by the end of the feed anyway, so not much to read into that.
Tonight, Rachael was still fully awake after her feed, but did not object to being put into the cot. She tossed and turned for quite a while, and I eventually gave up trying to pat her to sleep, as it didn't seem to be working. But she eventually was able to calm down and go to sleep, only holding my hand.
It's so wonderful on several fronts
1) She might actually sleep well eventually
2)She seems to be responding to the gradual changes
2) And a lot more important, the gentle approach seems to be working- she is not afraid of sleep, she is not afraid of her cot. It is rather vindicating that she's starting to do what "experts" who don't agree with our parenting approach claim that she'll never do if you don't take rather more severe measures
All at once she seems to be ready to eat solid foods and settle down with her sleep. No, I don't think the sleep is a result of the food intake, but a general maturing.
We'll see how it goes from here.
Sleep-wise, three nights ago, I decided that she was responding quite well to the night routine that I'd move it onto the next phase of getting her to go to sleep in her own cot after her feed.
First night, she was drowsy after the feed, and after 15 minutes was asleep in the cot after being patted to sleep.
Night two, she was super tired, and was asleep by the end of the feed anyway, so not much to read into that.
Tonight, Rachael was still fully awake after her feed, but did not object to being put into the cot. She tossed and turned for quite a while, and I eventually gave up trying to pat her to sleep, as it didn't seem to be working. But she eventually was able to calm down and go to sleep, only holding my hand.
It's so wonderful on several fronts
1) She might actually sleep well eventually
2)She seems to be responding to the gradual changes
2) And a lot more important, the gentle approach seems to be working- she is not afraid of sleep, she is not afraid of her cot. It is rather vindicating that she's starting to do what "experts" who don't agree with our parenting approach claim that she'll never do if you don't take rather more severe measures
All at once she seems to be ready to eat solid foods and settle down with her sleep. No, I don't think the sleep is a result of the food intake, but a general maturing.
We'll see how it goes from here.
Sunday, February 5, 2012
17 months
At 17 months, we're definately into Toddler territory. There's so much in the world that she wants and isn't allowed. There's also so much in the world she wants, is allowed, but she has diffuculty communicating what it is she's after. The first one won't change in a hurry, but we're hoping for some improvements for the second as we go along. Rachael's vocabulary is still pretty limited in relation to her opinions. Some more "functional" word (like those relating to food, drink and sleep) would hopefully reduce some of her fustration. So we're just have to wait for them to arrive. Her actual solid food consumtion has gone up in the last few days, like she's eating for sustenance, not just to play. We haven't been worrying about her small food intake up until now though, as she has really very good fork, spoon and bowl skills, it's jsut that she has chosen to only consume small portions. An increase in food consumption does lead to a concern though; reading the ingredients listing on "toddler" snack foods is rather quite disconcerting how much sugar is added into items marketed as"healthy".
I think I like each age a little more as we go (not overly hardfrom where I started though). This early toddler stage has Rachael swapping between being completely adorable and more challenging. And the adorable really is gorgeous. We have found however, the challenging is often assisted by a snack. It seems she is prone to the same blood sugar dips as her mother.
Sleep wise, we started adding a bedtime book into her routine, and settling her in her room at night at a regular time of 8:30. Sometimes she's asleep by 9, other times she's still wriggling around by 9:30. My aim is to hopefully have her settling in a decent timeframe regularly once she gets the hang of it. Overall, the hope is to gradually get her to the point where she will be able to actually go to sleep in her own bed. Then, if she can do that, mayby we can hope on her being more receptive to staying in the bed, and more likely to actually sleep overnight. Pretty lofty goal really. But at least I feel like we're actually trying something. That just mayby we'll get a full night sleep in the next 2 years.
Current obsession is how things work. Clips are of particular interest. Some days she doesn't want to come in out of the car, instead working on trying to figure out how to do up her carseat buckle. After much investigation, she's figured out how to do up the clip on her backpack harness. She'll spend ages to do it up, and as soon as it's together, she's rather impatient for a parent to undo it, so she can start again. Pram harness has a similar appeal. She's also very much into her pram. Not sitting in it, but she wants to push it. She's also rather keen on trying to plug my power cord into my computer, and the USB into the port (my poor computer) .
Rachael is also a bit of an accessoriser. I don't know where she got it from, definately not me. But she's into shoes, handbags and headbands. And she wants to wear her one pair of red socks every day. Red is definately the colour favourite. I managed to find some more red socks at country kids this week, haven't tried them with her yet, but I'm on a hunt for red socks. But at the same time it seems red socks are rather hard to find at the moment.
Another red item is Murray and Captian Feathersword from the Wiggles. She's just recently discovered the Wiggles, and they're her favourite characters. She was rather chuffed to discover Dorothy the Dinosaur on her pajama top though. The Wiggles have recently chucked out Sam to reinstate Greg. I listened to CDs of both yellow wiggles today. I have to say I think Sam is better.
School term starts back this week, and so does Rachael's swimming classes. It's rather sad to see that after not going to the pool for about 3 weeks over Christmas, Rachael has lost a lot of her pool confidence. But I guess three weeks is a long time when you're 17 months. She is getting back into the swing of it, so I hope she'll be back to where she was soon enough.
Rachael had her first play date in the last month. Didn't really go that well, but it's a start. I'm thinking of not going to playgroup for the next few months, as it's rather intimidating to have so many kids, and start setting up some one-on-one playdates instead.
Rachael is also trying to perfect her "cute" look (and it is SO cute). We've caught her practising it in the reflection of the oven door.
I think I like each age a little more as we go (not overly hardfrom where I started though). This early toddler stage has Rachael swapping between being completely adorable and more challenging. And the adorable really is gorgeous. We have found however, the challenging is often assisted by a snack. It seems she is prone to the same blood sugar dips as her mother.
Sleep wise, we started adding a bedtime book into her routine, and settling her in her room at night at a regular time of 8:30. Sometimes she's asleep by 9, other times she's still wriggling around by 9:30. My aim is to hopefully have her settling in a decent timeframe regularly once she gets the hang of it. Overall, the hope is to gradually get her to the point where she will be able to actually go to sleep in her own bed. Then, if she can do that, mayby we can hope on her being more receptive to staying in the bed, and more likely to actually sleep overnight. Pretty lofty goal really. But at least I feel like we're actually trying something. That just mayby we'll get a full night sleep in the next 2 years.
Rachael is also a bit of an accessoriser. I don't know where she got it from, definately not me. But she's into shoes, handbags and headbands. And she wants to wear her one pair of red socks every day. Red is definately the colour favourite. I managed to find some more red socks at country kids this week, haven't tried them with her yet, but I'm on a hunt for red socks. But at the same time it seems red socks are rather hard to find at the moment.
Another red item is Murray and Captian Feathersword from the Wiggles. She's just recently discovered the Wiggles, and they're her favourite characters. She was rather chuffed to discover Dorothy the Dinosaur on her pajama top though. The Wiggles have recently chucked out Sam to reinstate Greg. I listened to CDs of both yellow wiggles today. I have to say I think Sam is better.
School term starts back this week, and so does Rachael's swimming classes. It's rather sad to see that after not going to the pool for about 3 weeks over Christmas, Rachael has lost a lot of her pool confidence. But I guess three weeks is a long time when you're 17 months. She is getting back into the swing of it, so I hope she'll be back to where she was soon enough.
Rachael had her first play date in the last month. Didn't really go that well, but it's a start. I'm thinking of not going to playgroup for the next few months, as it's rather intimidating to have so many kids, and start setting up some one-on-one playdates instead.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
16 months
We've had Christmas and New Year in the last month, so it's been busy.
At this moment, Rachael's alseep on my bed. She's had a very busy morning with Grandma. It's rare at the moment for her to sleep without being attached to someone, but she was so tired she fell to sleep there right after her feed when I put her down so I could go to the toilet. She's just been sleeping very lightly during the day at the moment, so putting her into the cot wakes her up, and she won't go back to sleep. She's also refusing to go back to sleep in her own bed after feeds overnight, so we give up eventually, and bring her back to our bed so we can get some sleep ourselves.
No particular news eating-wise. Most of the time she still likes to eat very little. Sometimes it stresses me out, othertimes I'm more happy to let her decide. At the moment, Rachael has a thing for anything potato, as well as biscuits. Anything green veg is way off the radar. It does concern me that she may not be getting enough iron from solids, I have to take a iron suppliment on top of my pregnancy/feeding multivitamin or I feel like I've been run over my a truck, and we tend to have iron issues in the family, but she just plain old won't eat them. She's oven gone off her meat obsession, which is odd. And of course, she can't live on biscuits (even though she'd like to give it a shot I'm sure), not a good thing. It does help my mind somewhat though that she's still breastfeeding. Don't tell her it's nutritious, she's blissfully unaware of the fact. I know through this that she's still getting some amount of nutrients. There has been suggestion that if I weaned her, she'd eat better. There's no way to know, but I sort of get the feeling she'd eat larger quantities, but I don't think it'd affect her variety. I don't see her suddenly accepting broccoli just because she doesn't get milk.
Rachael didn't really get the point of Christmas gifts. She wasn't even particually keen on the wrapping paper. She did get some lovely gifts though, her favourite at the moment is probably her broom.
Rachael is really starting to get into toddler mode. Things she's not allowed to do or have fustrate her, so she gets angry. On the other hand, she can be incredible cute at times. We have been reminded that she watches everything we do; A few days ago I decided to take her to the swimming pool, so put my bathers on. Since I had just had my shower, Rachael knows part of my routine is to put on my underwear (shocking, I know ;). She seems to have decided that I forgot to do it, so got a clean pair of underwear out of my drawer, and tried to put them over my feet. I obligingly put them on, and had to take them off again when she wasn't looking.
At this moment, Rachael's alseep on my bed. She's had a very busy morning with Grandma. It's rare at the moment for her to sleep without being attached to someone, but she was so tired she fell to sleep there right after her feed when I put her down so I could go to the toilet. She's just been sleeping very lightly during the day at the moment, so putting her into the cot wakes her up, and she won't go back to sleep. She's also refusing to go back to sleep in her own bed after feeds overnight, so we give up eventually, and bring her back to our bed so we can get some sleep ourselves.
No particular news eating-wise. Most of the time she still likes to eat very little. Sometimes it stresses me out, othertimes I'm more happy to let her decide. At the moment, Rachael has a thing for anything potato, as well as biscuits. Anything green veg is way off the radar. It does concern me that she may not be getting enough iron from solids, I have to take a iron suppliment on top of my pregnancy/feeding multivitamin or I feel like I've been run over my a truck, and we tend to have iron issues in the family, but she just plain old won't eat them. She's oven gone off her meat obsession, which is odd. And of course, she can't live on biscuits (even though she'd like to give it a shot I'm sure), not a good thing. It does help my mind somewhat though that she's still breastfeeding. Don't tell her it's nutritious, she's blissfully unaware of the fact. I know through this that she's still getting some amount of nutrients. There has been suggestion that if I weaned her, she'd eat better. There's no way to know, but I sort of get the feeling she'd eat larger quantities, but I don't think it'd affect her variety. I don't see her suddenly accepting broccoli just because she doesn't get milk.
Rachael didn't really get the point of Christmas gifts. She wasn't even particually keen on the wrapping paper. She did get some lovely gifts though, her favourite at the moment is probably her broom.
Rachael is really starting to get into toddler mode. Things she's not allowed to do or have fustrate her, so she gets angry. On the other hand, she can be incredible cute at times. We have been reminded that she watches everything we do; A few days ago I decided to take her to the swimming pool, so put my bathers on. Since I had just had my shower, Rachael knows part of my routine is to put on my underwear (shocking, I know ;). She seems to have decided that I forgot to do it, so got a clean pair of underwear out of my drawer, and tried to put them over my feet. I obligingly put them on, and had to take them off again when she wasn't looking.
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| Getting into the Christmas Spirit, givng the Santa Claus look a go |
15 months
The 15 month blog never got posted. Why? Because I wrote it, was going to find a picture, but she woke up instead, so that was the end of that. I went back to post it a few days later, but it all had changed, so I re-wrote most of it, but it never quite got posted. Sure enough, it changed again. That's life with a mini-toddler; it keeps changing, particually on the sleep front.
In the begining, we were having a particually diffucult time with lack of sleep.
We had a few nights where Rachael was feeding every 2 hours or less. After a few day, I was over it. I was tired, I wanted to do anything to get a night's sleep. I was going to night wean (immediately). I was going to hire a babysitter for a night's sleep. Then Rachael and I went to see a friend, had a chat and then came back to a more rational truth. Our truth, at that time is that either would most probably be damaging to Rachael. Yes, I would love to get a full night's sleep, but there's no harm in waiting a little longer to see if she'll be ready to do this on her own. I may have to night wean her at some time in the future, and I have read up on some gentle stratergies for if they are required, but I don't want to do it before 18 months. She isn't ready to comprehend the communication side that these stratergies use. And these nights are really handy to point out another truth to me- Rachael will remain an only child for a while longer. There is absolutely no way I am ready to go back to the newborn no sleep stage yet.
Then shse started to sleep better. Her solids intake increased (it was becoming almost non-existant when she was at home with me), she increased her water intake a lot, and went back to sleeping. She went from her 3 hourly feeds that she's had since birth, to feeding 4 hourly overnight, for a few days. Which is absolutely lovely. It means I was still getting disturbed sleep, but more likely to get more complete sleep cycles in (woo hoo). And for a 9:30pm to 4:30am sleep on a work day, we've only had one feed instead of two. But it only lasted a few days, and we're back to fairly regular feeding again.
When Rachael is with either grandmother, or Jai, the increased cosumption of other food and drink mean daytime feeds are reduced to a feed before her nap, an afternoon feed and then bedtime feed. This is much more like what I expected extended feeding to be when I researched it, rather than the around the clock that we'd been doing. But if it's just the two of us, it's still regular feeding.
Since then, she's settled back into her old habits.
I can't rememver what else was happening, so I'll just start my 16 month post
In the begining, we were having a particually diffucult time with lack of sleep.
We had a few nights where Rachael was feeding every 2 hours or less. After a few day, I was over it. I was tired, I wanted to do anything to get a night's sleep. I was going to night wean (immediately). I was going to hire a babysitter for a night's sleep. Then Rachael and I went to see a friend, had a chat and then came back to a more rational truth. Our truth, at that time is that either would most probably be damaging to Rachael. Yes, I would love to get a full night's sleep, but there's no harm in waiting a little longer to see if she'll be ready to do this on her own. I may have to night wean her at some time in the future, and I have read up on some gentle stratergies for if they are required, but I don't want to do it before 18 months. She isn't ready to comprehend the communication side that these stratergies use. And these nights are really handy to point out another truth to me- Rachael will remain an only child for a while longer. There is absolutely no way I am ready to go back to the newborn no sleep stage yet.
Then shse started to sleep better. Her solids intake increased (it was becoming almost non-existant when she was at home with me), she increased her water intake a lot, and went back to sleeping. She went from her 3 hourly feeds that she's had since birth, to feeding 4 hourly overnight, for a few days. Which is absolutely lovely. It means I was still getting disturbed sleep, but more likely to get more complete sleep cycles in (woo hoo). And for a 9:30pm to 4:30am sleep on a work day, we've only had one feed instead of two. But it only lasted a few days, and we're back to fairly regular feeding again.
When Rachael is with either grandmother, or Jai, the increased cosumption of other food and drink mean daytime feeds are reduced to a feed before her nap, an afternoon feed and then bedtime feed. This is much more like what I expected extended feeding to be when I researched it, rather than the around the clock that we'd been doing. But if it's just the two of us, it's still regular feeding.
Since then, she's settled back into her old habits.
I can't rememver what else was happening, so I'll just start my 16 month post
Sunday, November 13, 2011
14.5 months
Yes, it's rather late, but my computer has been having some serious issues for the last few weeks. It's a pity, because it was a rather exciting time. Rachael took a few steps on her 13 month birthday. But then refused to for another 3 weeks. I don't know if she fell over too many times that day, or simply forgot she could do it the next morning. But she did decide to start again eventually, and is well and truely walking now (when she feels like it anyway).
Other highlights of the last six weeks for Rachael include the visitation of Tabitha, Addie and Clementine. Rachael found the two girls to be a bit intimidating, but did still have some fun. I have found that she loves to have one playmate (Jack or Noah are lots of fun), but two or more children seems to be a bit much for her (Jack and Orlani), at this stage, so she will be rather clingy until one child goes home, and will start to have fun with just the one, right when it is time for us to go home.I haven't downloaded any pictures yet, will have to do so I can post some.
In the last week Rachael has also had a virus that gave her a fever and was sleepy for a few days. Of course, as soon as I took her to the doctor to have it checked out (costing $100, being a Public Holiday), she got better. I think her eye teeth may not be too far off either. Of course they may be stubborn and take a few months yet, but I'd prefer to have it over.
I had a personal highlight yesterday, getting to meet, and actually have a chat to Pinky McKay. I was rather excited about it. I've only discovered her when Rachael was about 12 months, reading the "Toddler Tactics" book Tabitha gave me a while ago. I wish I'd had her baby book when Rachael was born. Her philosophy on raising babies/toddlers really fit into what I felt instinctively, which was quite different to the other baby/toddler books I had. Trying to explain it to someone else (particually who has not had children) is a bit hard. The concept of treating a child with love, support, having realistic expectations based on their capability, and being respectful of the child a human being; it sounds so obvious. That's what makes it hard to explain how it is so different. I do also enjoy getting her fortnightly email. It's good to be reminded to parent gently, it's so easy to get caught back in doing things "to" the child, rather than seeing it from their side.
I'm not here to bash anyone else's parenting style, but books that tell me I should be weaning my toddler regardless of either of us desire to or she'll risk malnutrition; and having parents stop each other from going in to comfort a scared baby to "train" them to sleep are not right for ME. And I am of the belief that is it not right for Rachael, being the unique and sensitive individual that she is.
And on a train of thought from that, it took 14 months, but Rachael is finally able to sleep in her own cot for daytime sleeps. This makes for one rather happy mummy, as I can have a small time to myself, as I am right now. As long as you don't plan to eat in that time; because I'm sure the beep of a microwave could wake Rachael even from a coma. Contrary to popular opinion (as I have been made very aware) I see this new delevopment (independant sleep, not microwave food) as a sucess, not a failure of our parenting. We did what Rachael needed to feel secure for the time she needed it, but having developed enough, (probably due to having gained some idea of object permanence), she is now ready to sleep by herself. Do I think everyone should do it? Heck no, it just seems that Rachael has a higher comfort and security need than the majority of children of her age. We never set out to do it like that, I don't think anyone ever would, but we see it as responding to her needs, rather than making a "rod for your back". In the end what I knew would happen occured- she's do it when she's ready. Hippy much? Oh well, it's my blog after all. I'm just noting what works for me as I go along, I'm not pretending to be an expert on anything; parenting, nutrition or breastfeeding (or not) included.
Foodwise, Rachael will eat, drink water and milk I've left, well for everyone else except me. For me, she is insitant on breastmilk only. I did get to have a discussion with Pinky about this (eeek), and she assures me that she'll still be getting adequate nutrition, and will grow out of this phase in her own time. In addition, it may have something to do with breastmilk having an analgesic effect, so if it's helping with her teething (seriously, when isn't she teething?), it's natural that she may prefer it when thiongs are bothering her.
One thing that keeps coming back again and again is that she'll do things when she's ready, in her own time. You'd think I already would know that, but it seems a lesson I've got to learn over and over to trust her.
She's also super-cute at the moment (to me at least). Yesterday Jai realised that when I'm not home, and she wants a drink of her milk, she'll do her own sign for a breastfeed (I gave up on trying to teach her the "proper" sign, hers will doquite fine), and then point. What she is pointing at is the picture of us at our wedding on the wall. So she wants a drink of mummy's milk. Awwwww. That melts my heart.
The flip side is that my baby has definately turned into a Toddler. As soon as she's started walking, the tantrums have begun. Mobilisation has allowed her to move from one activity that she know's she's not allowed to do, to another in quick succession, resulting in a string of "no"s. Poor girl. That's rather fustrating to her. Supermarkets and shops now have a new allure, seeing as she can now get to them, she want to go test everything out. Somehow clingyness goes right out the window when it comes to exploring, and she's quite happy to wander off to investigate in the shops, despite having no idea where I am at the time (yes, I do actually know where she is though). But these situations also encourage tantrums, no vocals or kicking yet, just throwing herself forward onto the floor. Thinking back, I should have avoided some of these situations by being more careful of when she is out. Shopping when she was tired never was a problem when she would just fall asleep in the carrier, but tiredness mixed with the ultrastimulation of a department store is just begging for a meltdown. Another mummy thing to learn: think about what time is best for her, not just most convenient for me.
Okie dokie, after all that I think I need some lunch. If she's still asleep I might see about getting some photos up
In the last week Rachael has also had a virus that gave her a fever and was sleepy for a few days. Of course, as soon as I took her to the doctor to have it checked out (costing $100, being a Public Holiday), she got better. I think her eye teeth may not be too far off either. Of course they may be stubborn and take a few months yet, but I'd prefer to have it over.
I had a personal highlight yesterday, getting to meet, and actually have a chat to Pinky McKay. I was rather excited about it. I've only discovered her when Rachael was about 12 months, reading the "Toddler Tactics" book Tabitha gave me a while ago. I wish I'd had her baby book when Rachael was born. Her philosophy on raising babies/toddlers really fit into what I felt instinctively, which was quite different to the other baby/toddler books I had. Trying to explain it to someone else (particually who has not had children) is a bit hard. The concept of treating a child with love, support, having realistic expectations based on their capability, and being respectful of the child a human being; it sounds so obvious. That's what makes it hard to explain how it is so different. I do also enjoy getting her fortnightly email. It's good to be reminded to parent gently, it's so easy to get caught back in doing things "to" the child, rather than seeing it from their side.
I'm not here to bash anyone else's parenting style, but books that tell me I should be weaning my toddler regardless of either of us desire to or she'll risk malnutrition; and having parents stop each other from going in to comfort a scared baby to "train" them to sleep are not right for ME. And I am of the belief that is it not right for Rachael, being the unique and sensitive individual that she is.
And on a train of thought from that, it took 14 months, but Rachael is finally able to sleep in her own cot for daytime sleeps. This makes for one rather happy mummy, as I can have a small time to myself, as I am right now. As long as you don't plan to eat in that time; because I'm sure the beep of a microwave could wake Rachael even from a coma. Contrary to popular opinion (as I have been made very aware) I see this new delevopment (independant sleep, not microwave food) as a sucess, not a failure of our parenting. We did what Rachael needed to feel secure for the time she needed it, but having developed enough, (probably due to having gained some idea of object permanence), she is now ready to sleep by herself. Do I think everyone should do it? Heck no, it just seems that Rachael has a higher comfort and security need than the majority of children of her age. We never set out to do it like that, I don't think anyone ever would, but we see it as responding to her needs, rather than making a "rod for your back". In the end what I knew would happen occured- she's do it when she's ready. Hippy much? Oh well, it's my blog after all. I'm just noting what works for me as I go along, I'm not pretending to be an expert on anything; parenting, nutrition or breastfeeding (or not) included.
Foodwise, Rachael will eat, drink water and milk I've left, well for everyone else except me. For me, she is insitant on breastmilk only. I did get to have a discussion with Pinky about this (eeek), and she assures me that she'll still be getting adequate nutrition, and will grow out of this phase in her own time. In addition, it may have something to do with breastmilk having an analgesic effect, so if it's helping with her teething (seriously, when isn't she teething?), it's natural that she may prefer it when thiongs are bothering her.One thing that keeps coming back again and again is that she'll do things when she's ready, in her own time. You'd think I already would know that, but it seems a lesson I've got to learn over and over to trust her.
She's also super-cute at the moment (to me at least). Yesterday Jai realised that when I'm not home, and she wants a drink of her milk, she'll do her own sign for a breastfeed (I gave up on trying to teach her the "proper" sign, hers will doquite fine), and then point. What she is pointing at is the picture of us at our wedding on the wall. So she wants a drink of mummy's milk. Awwwww. That melts my heart.
The flip side is that my baby has definately turned into a Toddler. As soon as she's started walking, the tantrums have begun. Mobilisation has allowed her to move from one activity that she know's she's not allowed to do, to another in quick succession, resulting in a string of "no"s. Poor girl. That's rather fustrating to her. Supermarkets and shops now have a new allure, seeing as she can now get to them, she want to go test everything out. Somehow clingyness goes right out the window when it comes to exploring, and she's quite happy to wander off to investigate in the shops, despite having no idea where I am at the time (yes, I do actually know where she is though). But these situations also encourage tantrums, no vocals or kicking yet, just throwing herself forward onto the floor. Thinking back, I should have avoided some of these situations by being more careful of when she is out. Shopping when she was tired never was a problem when she would just fall asleep in the carrier, but tiredness mixed with the ultrastimulation of a department store is just begging for a meltdown. Another mummy thing to learn: think about what time is best for her, not just most convenient for me.Okie dokie, after all that I think I need some lunch. If she's still asleep I might see about getting some photos up
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